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Successfully co-parenting amicably with your ex



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Successfully co-parenting amicably with your ex can give your kids stability and a close relationship with both parents. It's possible to develop a cordial working relationship with your ex for the sake of the kids. No-one is saying it's easy but if you can put aside any relationship issues and concentrate more on co-parenting, your children will benefit in the long run. One of the many keys to co-parenting is to stay calm, consistent and avoid any conflicts with your ex husband or wife in order to make joint custody work.

After splitting up, joint custody arrangements can be extremely difficult. Even little things like having to see each other at drop offs or speaking to the person you were once with, can make co-parenting seem like an impossible task. In one way it may be helpful if you start thinking about your relationship with your ex as a completely new one. At the end of the day successfully co-parenting is all about the well-being of your children and not about either of you. Your relationship may be over, but your family is not, so doing what's best for the kids should be your top priority.

There's no doubt about it, co-parenting is the best option for your children. It won't take long for your kids to recognize that they are more important than the issues that ended your relationship. They will quickly understand that your love for them will be ongoing despite the changing circumstances. Kids whose parents have a cooperative relationship tend to feel more secure and confident of the love from both parents. They will also benefit from consistency, in other words, know what to expect and what's expected of them from mom and dad. Children who see their parents continuing to work together are more likely, in the future, effectively and peacefully, be able to solve problems themselves.

At the end of the day, by getting on with the other parent, you are establishing a life pattern your kids can carry on into the future. The main thing to co-parenting is to focus on your children and only your children. Yes this isn't always easy, it means that emotions like anger, resentment, hate or hurt, need to take a back seat for the sake of the kids. OK putting aside your own feelings can be the most difficult part of co-parenting with your ex. It's not about your feelings or those of your ex partner, but it is about your child, their happiness, stability and well-being for the future.

Before co-parenting, get your own feelings right. Never vent your emotions in front of your child or children, no matter how strongly you feel about your ex partner. Remember that body language can be a good idea when co-parenting. Try to relax, look calm and cheerful, forget your past issues. You'll find that working as a co-parenting team will not just benefit the kids, but you as well.

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